We Are Wimpy!

We, as a society, are wimpy.  We become more and more sensitive to every news article or Twitter post that rubs us even slightly the wrong way. We turn to social media as an outlet and believe it exists only as a means for us to vent our perspective.  If we don't like something, well, instead of doing something productive to change it, we voice our frustration in a Facebook rant.  Seven likes later - there, you feel better.  You DID do something about it.  You just changed the world, didn't you?

I'm not blaming social media for the current state of our culture; it had to be expected as the world grew more connected.  We all have a right to be heard - I'm not denying that - it's just that now we can easily access an audience for our tirades instead of chewing the ear of our significant other or neighbor or co-workers over the water cooler.  In fact, I don't even mind the obsession our society has with "being heard" and "making a point".  I think it even offers an advantage to the "doers" over the "talkers". 

Why do the "talkers" do what they do (or, don't do what they could do?)?  It starts young.  Parents these days (man, I'm sounding old!) do everything in their power to ensure that their kids are comfortable, regardless of how much they are being set up to fail.  Megan McArdle opens her book, "The Upside of Down" with a discussion on how schools are set up to let children fail later in their lives.  Parents side with their kids over teachers, grade averages are increasing - not due to smarter students, but out of convenience, multiple valedictorians are named in the same school - sometimes in the 30's and 40's - because "no one wants to make a distinction between the kids".  In general, everyone gets a trophy for participating.

"Waiting for the Universe to Respond to What You've Been Manifesting"

Over the weekend, I stumbled upon this picture on Instagram:

 

 

It was so ridiculous and pointless - just like most brain-drain social media posts, I suppose - but it was also one of those images that became stuck in my head.  How often do you feel like this?  I mean, REALLY feel like this?  I've felt this way more lately than I can ever remember - and it's tough.  Anxiety has got to be one of the most difficult emotions to suppress.  If you're like me - and I'm assuming if you're reading this then we likely share number of similar characteristics - it is not in your nature to sit back and watch the world go by.  You need to be doing something; you need to be planting some seed or nurturing one that you've previously sown.  Sitting and watching is next to impossible. 

Entity and Incremental Learning

From Business Insider

I've been on a bit of a psychological kick lately digging into books like "Bounce" and "Thinking Fast and Slow" - which is quickly becoming one of my favorites and, by far, one of the most informative I've ever come across.  "Bounce" mentions some of the work of Carol Dweck, who was the author of "Mindset", which contains some mind blowing information on how our minds work and how we can condition them to focus on success.

While her book was a great read, I had forgotten - or, more likely, didn't yet understand - how enlightening her concepts really were.  That was until a couple of months ago.  Not only did her writing continue to pop up in a number of books I had been reading, but my son was born.  After seeing how fast little babies pick up new habits and how quickly they learn, I began to think about the best way to raise him from a psychological standpoint to empower him to live the best life he possibly can.  I remembered Dweck and gave myself a refresher of her teachings, which took on an entirely different meaning than the first time I plowed through "Mindset". 

One of the tenets of "Mindset" was the distinction between entity and incremental learning.  Entity learning was the belief that brainpower and intelligence were innate and could not be improved.  It gave the individual a sense of entitlement.  On the opposite end of the spectrum was incremental learning:  the belief that "the novice can become the master" (quoted from "The Art of Learning").  Empowering! 

Deliberate Practice in Pursuit of Goals

For years now, I've been enthused and passionate about investigating the role of talent in shaping the person we become in our lives.  Books like "Talent is Overrated" by Geoff Colvin, "Outliers" by Malcolm Gladwell, and "Mindset" by Carol Dweck had huge impacts on shaping my perspective about innate abilities and showing evidence that we all truly have much more control over our lives than we initially assume.  I have recently read "Bounce" by Matthew Syed, who was an Olympic table tennis player for Great Britain.  He had won numerous European table tennis championships as well as Commonwealth Championships - but readily admits to choking in the 2000 Sydney Olympics.  At that point, he began to investigate the intricacies of success, why some experts choke, and the role of genetics in shaping our talent.  The book was phenomenal (I hope to do a write up on it soon).  Syed knows a thing or two about success in athletics at the highest levels, which gives the book some validity over the others, who were written by psychologists and journalists.  "Bounc" is like "Talent is Overrated", "Outliers", and "Mindset" on steroids (in fact, Syed even talks about steroid use in sports!).

Anyway, it was another eye opener into what we are truly capable of accomplishing with, as Colvin defines it, "deliberate practice".  Deliberate practice can be thought of as hours of focused practice - not going to the driving range to hit golf balls, but going to the driving range, focusing on the grip for hundreds of swings, then focusing on the backswing for hundreds of swings, etc.  Ideally, you'd be able to film yourself or receive immediate feedback so you can make minor adjustments.  Watch this talk from Colvin.  While this task is much different than perfecting a golf swing, the message remains unchanged:

Review: "Getting There" - Gillian Zoe Segal

"Getting There" may be my favorite book of 2015.  Gillian Zoe Segal does a fantastic job compiling anecdotal stories of successful people from all walks of life.  The book is structured such that each story is approximately 2-4 pages long, with some biographical information on the subject.  Each section concludes with lessons, or "pearls", as Segal puts it, that the subject has picked up throughout their journey.  Segal's background as a photographer is obvious with a beautiful portrait of each subject at the beginning of the respective chapter.  The book in itself is a piece of art. 

Her compilation spans the globe and covers subjects from all ends of the spectrum, from Wendy Kopp, founder of Teach for America, to Laird Hamilton, big wave surfer; from Nitin Nohria, Harvard Business School Dean, to Michael Bloomberg, former New York Mayor and founder of Bloomberg L.P.; and from investor Warren Buffett to Sam Adams brewer/founder, Jim Koch.  Anderson Cooper shares his journey in journalism and discusses the sacrifices he made along the way to becoming a CNN news anchor and host of his own show.  John Paul Dejoria discusses surviving off of 99 cent chips and chicken wings and a trucker's special breakfast, while living in his car and hustling his hair products.

Shyp in Chicago!

Last night, I was fortunate enough to attend a "fireside chat" at the General Assembly in Chicago with Kevin Gibbons, CEO and Co-founder of Shyp, and Antonio Gracias, CEO of Valor Equity Partners and board member on Tesla.  Mr. Gracias moderated the discussion and had some very interesting questions Mr. Gibbons. 

In case you are unfamiliar, Shyp is a company designed to make shipping easier and "frictionless".  You simply download the app, take a picture of the item you intend to ship with a pick up address, and a Shyp courier swings by (usually within 20 minutes) to pick up your package, wrap it, package it, and send it. 

The Opportunity Cost of Fantasy Football

I have recently been the recipient of verbal office jabs for my choice to abstain from Fantasy Football this year.  My retort?  The opportunity cost of drafting, managing, and discussing Fantasy Football does not warrant participation.  I played last year.  I enjoyed it.  I enjoyed it a little too much, spending Sunday's refreshing my phone at the local B-Dubs, telling my wife I need some obscure receiver to catch at least 4 passes for me to lock in a playoff spot - as if to include her in my predicament.  The end of the season was a welcome relief, maybe as much for me as it was for her.  No matter how many times I have vowed to not let FF take over my life, I still found myself sucked into the office banter throughout the week and a zombie - a shell of my non-football self - on Sundays.  I am STILL being sucked into the office conversations, and I'm not even playing this year!  That's power of Fantasy Football!

What is the tradeoff for that time and stress?  What am I missing out on?  Am I getting more out of participating than I would from some other activity?  What are the opportunity costs?

Beer Economics: To Brew or not to Brew . . .

We all have our "thing".  The "thing" . . . you know, the one that you, savor extraordinaire, just won't budge on.  It goes against every principle you try to uphold on a daily basis.  It's material, it's expensive, it's unnecessary, but it's sooooooo good!  Maybe it's coffee?  No, you would never frequent Starbucks each morning for a $5 Pumpkin Spice Latte with your name spelled incorrectly down the side - that would be asinine.  But there are still ways to get your fix, to feed that craving, and conquer that one weakness for a reasonable price.  Maybe when you're at the grocery store staring at that wall of Folgers and Maxwell House, maybe you can't help yourself but reach for a bag of Peet's for only $1 more per bag, or 15 cents more per pot.

Mine?  Mine is craft beer.  My dad had been brewing beer long before it was hip.  I sidestepped the Icehouse college phase.  I never "moved up" to the expensive Coors Light.  Nope, my first "bad" beer was Sam Adam's.  At that point, I was doomed.  It's a one way track.  A guy can move from Iowa to California and he'll understand what he had been missing, but you can't expect a Californian to relocate from San Diego to Des Moines and survive.  It's a step backwards, in his eyes.  After my dad's craft beer, there was no turning back. 

But craft beer exploded.  Now, a six pack of Lagunitas Little Sumpin' Extra ale will set you back $9.99, if you're lucky, and that's before taxes.  You want to buy Ballast Point Sculpin in Chicago?  How about $13 minimum?!

Utility - In Another Sense

Utility, in an economic sense, is defined in Investopedia as:

"Utility is an abstract concept rather than a concrete, observable quantity. The units to which we assign an "amount" of utility, therefore, are arbitrary, representing a relative value. Total utility is the aggregate sum of satisfaction or benefit that an individual gains from consuming a given amount of goods or services in an economy."

I became familiar with the term "utility" in this regard from Jordan Ellenberg's "How Not To Be Wrong" and it intrigued me.  Business Insider and Smithsonian give nice summaries of its use in the book here and here respectively.  The gist of it is that everything comes with a cost and you need to ask yourself what cost are you willing to pay for a level of comfort.  It is an "inconvenience factor" and Ellenberg measures it in utils.

Financial Freedom - July 2015

I recently (better late than never!) came across a couple of blogs that I really enjoyed on personal finance:  Root of Good and Mr. Money Mustache.  Both blogs focus on early retirement and different techniques to become financially independent - my goal numero uno.  Mr. Money Mustache has a way of conveying to readers the proper mindset one needs to go down this path and the differences between those who achieve this goal and those who do not.  My favorite part of Root of Good is the financial update and transparency he provides into his family's financials with monthly updates. 

After being inspired by these two blogs of men who have successfully obtained financial freedom, it occurred to me that, while it is extremely beneficial to read about the reflections of those who have succeeded, it may be even more beneficial to document the journey as it unfolds.

Personal Goals - Ultimate, Tangible, and Intangible

My Goals:

SUCCESS = FREEDOM

1)  No regrets
2)  Maximize time with family and ensure happiness
3)  Financial Freedom by 1/1/2020
4)  Relocate family and purchase home in Chicago area.  Accomplished 3/31/2015
5)  Purchase/Open Business
6)  Travel as much as possible

*Doing all of this with integrity in a way that would make God proud and with the end result of leaving this world a better place than when I entered it.

As you can see, some of these are more tangible than others.  No regrets?  Maximize time with family?  It is difficult to quantify whether or not these are accomplished.  I'll tell you that I KNOW when I'm NOT spending enough time with family, but how do you really know if you have maximized it? 

Overcoming Weakness

How can you expect to improve in your area of expertise, your chosen field, or as a person in general by focusing solely on your strengths?  Everyone has a weakness; what differentiates those who succeed from those who do not is how those weaknesses are dealt with. 

In "The Art of Learning", Josh Waitzkin discusses the necessity to identify your weaknesses and work on improving them until they no longer hold you back.  In case you are not aware, Josh is the subject of the book and movie "Searching for Bobby Fischer". 

The Power of Silence

-"Brevity is the soul of wit.  If you've got something to say, say it and stop talking.  If you don't have anything to say, you're doing yourself and others a favor by keeping quiet.  If you can't make a contribution, don't slow down the people who can."  -Craig Newmark, Craigslist Founder, "Getting There"

Listen more, talk less.  Try it.  As with any exercise in discipline, it is difficult at first, becomes easier with practice, and, once accomplished, is EXTREMELY empowering and fulfilling.  So many people feel they have to make a statement about all topics that come up in casual conversation.  Why? 

What it boils down to is protection of ego. 

The Problem with Self-Help

It seems everywhere you turn these days, someone is trying to help you help yourself - with either rah-rah infomercials or "You Can Do It" blogs. Here are a few problems I see with these:

How much time and money are you spending on these products?

Think about what you could accomplish in the time you expended constantly reading self-help blogs and ebooks online? Think about what you could do with the money you spent on purchasing products from these gurus. You could save it up and buy some weights, if your goal is go become more fit.

8 Minor Adjustments to Maximize Productivity Towards Your Ultimate Goal

I don't think an entire blog needs to be dedicated to changing your daily life.  I think you can get the point across in a single post or two.  Once you have a handle on it, you should be able to assess your own life and optimize your actions - no further blog reading or research necessary on how to maximize the time in your day.  So . . .

Each morning offers the opportunity to start fresh . . . a new beginning, a clean slate.  Many people wake up and immediately begin to stress and dread about what they have to do that day.  That mentality sets the stage for an unorganized, unproductive day.  Others use the morning to plan out tasks they intend to accomplish that day to help them reach their ultimate goal.  That small difference can have an extraordinary compounding effect and create a drastic advantage for that person over others.  For a quick analysis of how little changes can make a big difference, check out a previous post comparing Al and Joe and the differences in their routines.

Making slight adjustments each day can create the foundation for a healthier, more productive life, set you up to ultimately achieve your goal, and pay dividends in your future.  Below are 8 suggestions for maximizing your time each day:

1. Workout in the morning

Planning to workout in the morning can mean an improved chance that you actually do workout that day. 

Like Billy Beane Playing Small-Stakes Poker

Small-Stakes Texas Hold 'Em is based on a series of bets that are capped after three rounds of betting.  For example, the first round of betting, after the cards are dealt in a $3-$6 game, requires a $3 bet, nothing more, nothing less.  After subsequent cards are turned (the 'flop', the 'turn', and the 'river'), betting is capped at $6 per round. 

These betting rules play a significant role in strategy and have a tremendous psychological effect on

The Roots of Laziness

"All life demands struggle. Those who have everything given to them become lazy, selfish, and insensitive to the real values of life. The very striving and hard work that we so constantly try to avoid is the major building block in the person we are today."

-Pope Paul VI

Laziness is innate; it was a necessary trait for survival from our distant ancient ancestors.  In Jared Diamond’s Pulitzer Prize winning book “Guns, Germs, and Steel”, early hunter-gatherers would constantly – and probably unconsciously - weighed the risk-reward of their expeditions, with the goal of obtaining the most calories for as little effort as possible. 

The Art of Discipline

"We must all suffer one of two things:  the pain of discipline or the pain of regret or disappointment."

-Jim Rohn

Attaining success requires discipline - no surprise to anyone.  Sidenote:  I'm a big advocate of definitions as too many discussions have lacked resolution and too many articles have left the reader confused by not properly defining the parameters of the subject under consideration.  "He has too much talent!"  "She just got lucky!", etc.  Talent?  Luck? 

So, what does "discipline" mean?  One dictionary.com definition defines "discipline" as:  "activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill; training."  This is the definition we are going to use.

Success: One Man's Definition

Success is personal fulfillment.  It doesn't need to be flaunted or advertised or even noticed by others for it to matter.  It can be a goal to become the next Michael Jordan, Warren Buffett, or super-dad.  To play the guitar like Jimi Hendrix or to be the first of your family to graduate from college.  Success is how you perceive your own life - not how the outside world perceives it and especially not how much money and material goods you can accumulate.  This isn't just a rah-rah cliché - it's the facts.  Ask people who you perceive to be successful about how they reached that level.  Research what people did before they became famous.  I guarantee you that you will find a common thread between their stories.  They didn't do it for the money, they did it because of their love of the pursuit of excellence in their chosen field. 

To begin, I have come to believe that four categories of people exist as it pertains to success:

1)  Those who achieve success and stay on top.  These rare people are "bred" for success - they are brought up from day one training toward a certain goal or who somehow recognize the opportunity early on and have the wherewithal to seize it.  They also accumulate the life skills required to stay on top.  These people may have been guided by a parent or mentor from an early age, but the passion to succeed in their chosen field came from within.  They somehow recognized an opportunity and seized it.  Examples may include:  Warren Buffett, Beethoven, Michael Jordan

2)  Those who reach success, but eventually fall from grace.  They have the technical skill acquired from just enough effort to be able to reach a certain level, but they do not have the mental fortitude to stay on top and, therefore, eventually sink back to the realms of the regular Joe – or worse.  These people may have been pushed beyond their limits by a parent to participate in some activity as a child, without possessing an actual passion for that activity.  Or, they may have lost their senses and control of their own life to a non-desirable trait, like greed or envy or addiction. Examples may include:  Jamarcus Russell or Ryan Leaf; One hit wonder artists; Tiger Woods, to some extent; Bernie Maddoff.

3)  Those who slowly, surely, work towards success.  These people are not brought up knowing what they are going to do or accomplish from an early age, but they eventually come to the realization that, to get what they want out of life, they need to prepare differently from others – train more rigorously, study more intensely, etc.  They understand and possess passion, which leads to goal-setting.  That passion eventually consumes their lives and everything they set out to do in some way is a step towards achieving their goal.  This is the category most successful people fall into and the category anyone can become a part of.  These people tend to have the strongest foundation and, once they achieve success, they tend to stay on top.  They know failure; they’ve felt it most of their lives, but they do not view these missteps as setbacks, but instead as building blocks to a stronger foundation.  Examples may include:  Steve Jobs, many pro athletes.

4)  Those who never achieve success and never strive to, either.  Not much explanation is needed on this one.  We all can name a handful of people who never seem to want anything out of life.  They stay on the sidelines watching others, often critiquing, but rarely participating.  The most frustrating of this category is the man who is blessed with a good brain, a strong body, or an ear for beautiful music, but who fails to recognize these features as gifts and don’t utilize them or develop them to full potential.  Even worse, some bank on these gifts to just “get by”, diminishing the need to develop other life skills along the way, and creating a ceiling on their potential as they progress through life.  Whether the root cause is a lack of awareness of the power of their gifts or pure laziness, the couch is home, instead of the gym, the office, the concert hall. 

My purpose for writing this blog is to focus on #3; if you're reading this blog, it is highly likely you fit into this category.  I hope to provide inspiration for the individual who possesses the tools - they have the courage, drive, and passion - to succeed, but may lack direction.  I hope to show you how others have overcome these obstacles, giving you stepping stones to assist in your journey to a life of fulfillment.